About BCNN
Our mission is to provide you with the most reliable and comprehensive news coverage any world has ever seen.

BCNN Stands for "Busty Chode News Network". Understandably, this acronym may come off as strange, confusing, and potentially profane. But rest be assured, our name reflects a rich and storied history. Before there was a company, there were two men: Theodosius Bustian and Robert Chode. Their first and only collaborative project was on a legendary and tragic tale put into the form of a novel. Their story was legendary, but they needed a name. Their idea was simply to combine their last names, so the story would be titled Bustian-Chode. However due to miscommunications with the publishing office, the first 500,000 copies were printed with the title Busty Chode instead.

To Robert Chode, having always been the butt of many jokes due to his unfortunate last name, he did not mind this. But for Theodosius Bustian, this was both devastating and unacceptable. Theodosius Bustian insisted on having every single copy altered to fix the name change, while Robert Chode didn't think it was worth the money, and believed the money would be better spent on a successful advertising campaign. They had a highly passionate debate, and unfortunatly could not resolve their differences, which led Robert Chode to permanently retire from working with Bustian and/or others. But after some deep reflection, Theodosius Bustian realized that it really did not matter, and he was letting his insecurities get in the way of successful business. So he contacted the company to have all the copies altered, not to change the title but to remove the name of Robert Chode from the list of authors.

The book was a smash hit, and provided Theodosius Bustian with massive funds to promote further business ventures, the first being Busty Chode News Network, or BCNN. The reporting of his company was so phenominal, Theodosius Bustian's name and his works became synonymous with BCNN, and so all further business ventures would be associated in name with BCNN. The business strategies of Theodosius Bustian were novel and led him to dominate the market in many different fields. Theodosius Bustian was also not afraid to pour money into endeavors that other companies were too afraid to invest in, such as in torsion field research, aetherial energies, and exporation into the unknown parts of our world. While not all of these ventures were a success, it did lead Theodosius Bustian to make revoultionary discoveries about the Hollow Earth, the Moon, the other Earths, Prison Planet, Business Prison, and other previously unknowns. He profited from all of this and more, and shared most of his discoveries with the world.

In the end, Theodosius Bustian left behind a rich history of profit, discovery, and benefit to all of human kind. But after long enough, he decided it was time to retire and return to a simple life like the one he grew up with in Ancient Greece. He interviewed with many for who would succeed him as President of BCNN, but in the end he decided the most fitting candidate for the position was a man named Jonathan "Too Decisive" Jones, who decisively decided to become the next President of BCNN.

The rule of Jonathan "Too Decisive" Jones was a short one, but still impactful due to the high volume of decisive decisions. He decisively invested in new technologies that allowed BCNN more instantaneous and effective world(s) coverage, such as sattelite feeds around the Earths, instantaneous interglobal communication through quantum entanglemennt, torsion-powered aircrafts to quickly and discreetly transfer news crews to news sites, regular reporting with divine beings, sacred geometry for a wide variety of uses, and innovative strategiest to cut down on printing costs. However short the reign of Jonathan "Too Decisive" Jones was, it was undoubtedly innovative and undoubtedly decisive.

But the rule of Jonathan "Too Decisive" Jones ended with the proposition of a merger with General Industries Group, a longtime competitor of BCNN in many of it's idustrial sectors. The merger was put forth by the President of GIG, Dog, and his assistant Paul Allen. As stipulated by the merger, GIG and its subsidaries would henceforth become subsidaries of BCNN, and the executive staff of GIG would be integrated with that of BCNN, with the President of BCNN maintaining total control. In return for this, Jonathan "Too Decisive" Jones would step down as President of BCNN and cede the position to Dog, and the Vice President of BCNN, which was also Jonathan "Too Decisive" Jones, would cede his position to Paul Allen. Jonathan "Too Decisive" Jones accepted this deal, and by the terms of the contract was compensated with a very large sum of cash and assets. The deal thus established Dog as the next and (of this date) current President of BCNN. Shortly after the deal was made, Jonathan "Too Decisive" Jones decisively dissapeared for five weeks before being decisively found alive at the bottom of a ditch in the Democratic Republic of the Congo, before decisively checking himself into a mental institution for the next four years.

Since then, Dog has maintained the original vision of BCNN to serve and inform the public. Dog has continued to fulfill these goals through a variety of aquisitions and expansions, as well as government connections, that have allowed BCNN to better exert its will to benefit the public in every way. To this day, BCNN continues to help people in endless ways that allow all, including you, to act with reliable information.